Dare to dream (again)
By Becky Baker
December has a strange energy.
The year is winding down, calendars are filling up with “last meetings” and somewhere between end-of-year reviews and holiday dinners, a quieter question starts knocking.
Sometimes gently.
Sometimes not.
For me, this year started with a plan and is ending with that much bigger question:
What do you want?
It’s a question I’ve been sitting with for weeks now, as I’ve started my own personal branding journey with a career coach. (Yes, even coaches need a coach sometimes.) It’s a deceptively simple question and a brutally honest one. Because when you’re tired, stretched or quietly unhappy, it’s often the hardest question to answer.
And I’m not alone.
Two conversations I can’t shake
A few weeks ago, I ran into a woman I worked with years ago. Brilliant. Driven. Deeply competent. She’s risen through the ranks at a high-tech company and now holds a highly influential role, driving innovation across Europe.
From the outside, it looks like a dream career.
So I asked her how she was doing.
Then I asked the question that really matters.
“Are you happy at work?”
She paused. Then she said, “Not really. My position looks great on paper, but the culture just isn’t a good fit.”
I felt it immediately. The fatigue. The heaviness. The quiet sense of “what now?” hanging in the air.
“I should probably make a change,” she said. “But I’ve been there so long. What can I do now? I don’t even know.”
So I asked her the same question I’ve been asking myself lately.
“What do you want?”
She looked at me and said, “Honestly? I don’t know.”
A few evenings later, I had almost the same conversation with another person. This time it was a man I worked with years ago. Another senior leader in tech. Another impressive title. Another career built at the edge of innovation.
When I asked him, “Are you happy?” he didn’t answer right away. He just gave me a pained look.
That look told me everything.
Both conversations left me with the same feeling. People who are deeply capable, highly successful and completely stuck.
When success becomes a cage
This is something I hear again and again from people in technical fields.
“I should be happy. I’ve achieved so much.”
But what they’re really feeling is…
“I’m miserable and I’m terrified to leave the place I worked so hard to get to.”
They don’t know what else they could do.
They can’t imagine a different future.
They’ve lost access to something essential.
Their dreams.
When you’re unhappy and stuck, dreaming feels risky. Even irresponsible. Dreaming opens the door to uncertainty and change. When you’re already exhausted, that can feel like too much.
So many people shut their dreams down completely.
I know something about changing dreams
When I was 13, my dream was simple. I wanted to write books people would enjoy reading.
Later, that dream evolved. I wanted my own company as a writer, using my talent to help people communicate better.
As I gained more experience working with high-tech companies, my dream became more focused. I wanted to help people communicate so they can create trust and impact.
Today, as a personal branding coach, I’m still pursuing that same dream. It simply shows up differently. Now I help women (and men) in technical fields become more visible and influential so they can do work that matters to them and makes a difference in the world.
The dream stayed.
The shape changed.
That’s something we often forget. Dreams are not fixed. They grow with us.
Why December is the perfect time to dream
December is not the month for big action.
It’s the month for big questions.
It’s a natural pause point. A moment to step back, breathe and reflect on who you’ve become and what you might want next. Not next week. Not next quarter. Next in a deeper sense.
So let’s do something radical.
Let’s flex your dreaming muscles, but ever so gently.
If you feel stuck, tired or disconnected from your dreams, start here. Ask yourself these five questions. Don’t rush them. Don’t judge the answers. Just listen.
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What did you dream of before you learned to be “realistic”?
Before mortgages, KPIs and performance reviews entered the picture, what did you imagine for yourself?
Not the job title, but the feeling.
Freedom. Creativity. Impact. Adventure. Belonging.
I remember wanting to travel the world and have a new adventure every day.
Your younger self wasn’t naïve. They were honest. Buried inside that early dream is often a clue about what still matters to you today.
You don’t have to go back there. But you might want to bring something forward.
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When do you feel most alive at work, even now?
Even in a job you don’t love, there are moments when your energy shifts.
When do you lose track of time?
When do you feel engaged, proud or quietly satisfied?
Those moments are breadcrumbs. They point toward your strengths and your intrinsic motivation. The things that energize you instead of draining you.
Dreams don’t come out of nowhere. They grow from what already gives you life.
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If fear wasn’t in charge, what would you want next?
This is the question most people avoid.
Fear is loud.
It says things like:
- “You’re too old.”
- “You’ll lose everything.”
- “You’re being ungrateful.”
- “Who do you think you are?”
For a moment, imagine fear stepping aside.
If you weren’t worried about money, status or explaining yourself to others, what would you want to explore, learn or change?
You don’t have to act on it.
You just have to admit it.
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What are you no longer willing to tolerate?
Dreaming isn’t only about desire. It’s also about boundaries.
What’s draining you?
What feels misaligned?
What are you staying silent about, at work or in yourself?
Often, the first step toward a new dream isn’t knowing what you want. It’s knowing what you won’t put up with any longer.
That kind of clarity is powerful.
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What if your experience gives you more freedom, not less?
Many senior professionals feel trapped by their own success.
“I’ve gone too far down this path.”
“I can’t start over now.”
“I don’t fit anywhere else.”
Experience doesn’t box you in. It expands your options.
If you trusted that everything you’ve learned could be translated or used in new ways, what might be possible?
Dreaming is not weakness. It’s leadership.
People who have lost their dreams don’t need fixing.
They need space.
Perspective.
Permission.
Everyone can dream. Sometimes you just have to remember how.
When you dare to dream again, you start to see options. You regain energy. And you realize that feeling stuck is often the moment that leads you to what’s next.
December is an invitation.
To ask yourself a dangerous, beautiful question.
What do you want?
Listen. Just listen.
Welcome to the Noblahblah Zone.
Check out these other blogs about changing your mindset, figuring out who you are, and being inspired by your own imagination.
Photo by Diljaz TM on Unsplash
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